Zeva Bellel

View Original

The hidden cost of under-valuing creativity

When I was a trend reporter the rule was "one is chance, two is coincidence and three is a trend." 

And right now I have three different clients connected in a strikingly, trend-specific way.

Their common connection? As kids, they were discouraged from nurturing their creative sensibilities because their families were scared about what would happen if they decided to pursue those paths professionally.

It sounds counter-intuitive, right? You've got a kid who devours four books a week, a kid who's exceptionally gifted at music, a kid who has a passion for collecting and transforming objects, but instead of feeling excited as a parent, you feel dread.

You see when you come from a family where science, math, law, etc are the gold standards, where they're held high above anything else, it's hard as a parent to get behind the idea of developing your child's creative side. 

The discouragements, for the most part, come from fear.  "What if she become an artist? How will she support herself? Ahh, scary, no!"

But let's play a game of "Fast Forward A Few Decades," shall we? 

Your kid has the degrees, the fancy title, the safe job, but then she starts to feel completely and totally out of whack and wonder "How did I get here?" "Who was calling the shots?" "Why did I decide to climb this ladder?" 

What's the most obvious risk of being discouraged from nurturing your creative sensibilities most of your life?

The number one I've seen is the deep sadness in silencing that special spark inside of you that's the source of so much joy. That deep rift creates a hole in the heart that looks to be filled elsewhere. 

Which can lead to some other consequences I've discovered when people search for value in ways unrelated to what flows naturally:

  • They lose their confidence in themselves and their ability to trust their intuition because they believe that their natural talents are worthless (literally worth-less) than other pursuits that were (and continue to be) much harder for them to excel at.
     

  • They latch on to a system of reward and recognition that's outside of themselves, detached from their inner compass and emotional foundation. That system's usually about extreme effort and external signs of value that can easily lead to over-exertion, emotional exhaustion and a feeling of complete misalignment. 
     

  • They forget that they already know what they like, what they're good at, what comes naturally to them, and that there are untapped possibilities for them within those worlds.


So what happens next? How do we unravel that onion and find our way back to the creative joy?

The number one stop is identifying the thoughts in your head that are telling you you're not doing it right. That you're not disciplined enough. Responsible enough. Hard-working enough. That's a telltale sign there's something stinky going on under the surface that's creating the misalignment.

Because when you peel the onion back you're bound to find that when it comes to doing the things that flow naturally, that give you pleasure, that you're innately good at, the responsibility, discipline, and effort aren't an issue. 

Do you ever feel irresponsible, undisciplined, not-good-enough?

What are you doing, or not-doing, when you say that about yourself?

When did those thoughts first appear in your mind?

And on the flip-side, what do you do naturally and without struggle without any voices telling you you're not doing it right?

Book a call and we can discuss! 

Much love to you today.

Zeva